Thursday, June 08, 2006
Its in his kiss (that's where it is)
Is it in his face ?
Oh no ! That's just his charms
In his warm embrace ?
Oh no ! That's just his arms
If you want to know if he loves you so
It's in his kiss
That's where it is
It's in his kiss
That's where it is

Couldn't resist quoting the Shoop Shoop Song, my apologies for bringing Cher to mind. At least I didn't do the I've Got You, Babe thing.

The question plaguing the Demystifying Divas and the charming men of The Men's Club this week is The Kiss. What do different kisses mean (lips, cheek, forehead, hand, and neck).

This question may be one of the easier ones for me to answer. To me, kisses are unambiguous. They are like a billboard to the soul, whether we are discussing les trois bises (forgive me if I'm misspelling the French air-kissing thing, my French is rusty) or the tongue down the throat thing.

Let me elaborate, because that is what these topics are all about: Elaborating and Enlightening.

Les Trois Bises, or the air kiss that is used by some as a greeting is merely that: a greeting. It is a friendly thing you do upon meeting a good friend or acquaintance. It is not something one ought to do with a stranger. It is more intimate and more friendly than a handshake, and less formal. I wouldn't expect to see this in a business setting, at least not in the US. To me, this kiss sends a message of "it is so good to see you again."

A kiss on the cheek is a more familiar. It is a quick hello or goodbye, good morning or good night, to a child or parent. The intimacy is between much closer relationships. This kiss is about real affection, but not a passionate or sexual man-woman affection, if you see the distinction. Although, I will leave open the possibility for a cheek kiss between two passionate adults as a playful act. To me, this kiss send the message, "I genuinely care for you."

A kiss on the forehead is more parental. You may kiss your child on the forehead as a way to send them off to sleepyland or before they head off to school. This kiss is acceptable to children from parents even when they get older because it is an act that defines the roles. The kisser is the parent and deposits a kiss on the child's forehead. The child is the receiver. This kiss says, "I love you, even so."

A kiss on the hand has two possible meanings. First, it can be a token of respect or deference when a gentlemen meets a lady. This gesture, I am sorry to say, has gone out of fashion except with older gentlemen raised to gentility and some lingering traces in The South reserved for more formal occasions. The second meaning is seduction. However, in the case of seduction, the kisses will start at the hand, not end there, if you see my point.

Which reminds me, "A kiss on the hand may be quite continental, but diamonds are a girl's best friend..."

For the last two, namely kisses on the lips and neck, it is difficult to claim that these are anything but romantic acts. If someone is kissing your neck, my hint to you is that they'd not choose to stop there. Moreover, lip kissing, whether perfunctory between a man and wife or much deeper between two lovers indicates the ultimate intimate relationship. It is not something that people engage in without an existing relationship or the hope of one.

I do hope that this has been helpful.

For more analysis on the different kisses, please go see what the delightful, decadent divas have to say. Then, for a man's perspective, check out our macho men.
posted by Phoenix | 8:50 AM


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