Every year I get a letter from E. Bunny. This year it came on letterhead. I have recreated the letter for you below.





Dear Phoenix and Prince Charming:

It is with sad regret that I must inform you that your Easter delivery will be late. There has been an upset at Easter Enterprises (read hostile takeover- rebellion stifled). It had become quite obvious that the lower-wing types were attempting a violent coo. Yes. It is too true. Though I was still under orders to relax from the strain of the last few years - bad case of bunny bunions, word came to me in time.

Although my faithful friend Mugafu stepped in to assist with the last few years, it has become increasingly obvious that it has brought out his more violent tendencies. I have tried repeatedly to explain to him that the entire annihilation of all chickens would occur if he kept up with his intention of turning all eggs into deviled eggs. His opinion is the best egg is a deviled one. Unfortunately, when he started shouting this opinion at barnyard gatherings, many of the hens, chickens that they are, became quite skittish about being part of our Easter celebrations. There has also been a scurrilous division in the ranks due to the extra work load now put upon the rest of the fuzzy bunnies.

Quite obviously, something has...er...had to be done -- immediately...

OhMYGAWD! Was that a gun shot? Back in a minute...

"IT'S FOR YOUR OWN GOOD!"

"CHILL OUT YOU WILD BASTARD!"

"IF I CATCH YOU..."

Slam!

Uh, where was I? Oh, yes. Mugafu, needing a bit of time to tranquilize...er...calm...er...de-stress has left to foment unrest and quell rebellions elsewhere. Somewhere around the greasy Zambeezi, I believe the address label...er...ticket said.

"WILBERFORCE! GET AWAY FROM THAT..."

Rest assured that with renewed vigor and hope we will be able to make deliveries on time. If not, they'll be late. Postcards and letters to Mugafu, as always, will be forwarded....

May this Easter be your best.

Sincerely,

E. Bunny

The Legend

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