Watch your feet, please, Major Rant Ahead...
I had to read the words of this cretinous, slack-jawed, simpleton twice before coming to the conclusion that, verily, he was not kidding.
So, naturally, I must rant.
Mr. Erik Lundegaard contends in his headline that "Santa Claus is strictly a red-state hero."
What an idiotic thing to suggest! The fool makes drama from children's folklore by tying it to the Presidential election. He pisses all over Christmas by saying that the vast majority of Christmas movies have a rightwing agenda that explains and dramatizes Santa by using the Bible. He claims that the only "blue" Christmas movies are "It's aWonderful Life," "A Christmas Story," and "Home Alone." He then trots out what he claims is the most famous Christmas story of all time (gee, and here I thought it was the one about Mary, Joseph, and the Inn) "A Christmas Carol." He says of it...
...take heart that the most famous Christmas story of all, Charles Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol,” is essentially a blue-state story. A cold-hearted, stingy bastard realizes, with the help of some spirits (or a guilty conscience and an undigested bit of beef), that, link by link, he’s forging chains in life that he’ll have to drag around throughout eternity. Its basic message is liberal: spreading wealth good; hoarding wealth, not so much. Plus it’s not hard — and kind of fun, actually — to imagine Vice-President Cheney, with his bald pate and perpetual scowl, as Ebenezer Scrooge. Or Jacob Marley? “In life, my spirit never rose beyond the limits of our money-changing holes! Now I am doomed to wander without rest or peace, incessant torture and REMORSE!” Yeah, Jacob Marley.
In an equally abhorent way, the "author" of this tripe says that another author's article pointed out to him that he is part of the "reality-based community" rather than the "faith-based community." Which is a passive-aggressive way of saying that people who have faith, or practice religion as a part of their life, (the much over-hyped demographic GWB & Karl Rove tapped into) are wack-a-doo nutjobs. However, the term "reality-based" suggests not-living-in-reality...Am I right? "Reality-based" is so-called as to differentiate it from ACTUAL REALITY! Ho-HO!
He continues on his track, coming to a point where he ties faith, as in believing without seeing, as in Tim Allen's "The Santa Clause" to those missing WMD. He suggests, I believe, that the Administration wants us to blindly believe in those WMD in the way that children blindly believe in Santa Claus. I can't read this as anything other than insulting, both to children and adults alike.
The guy is a schmuck, and completely misses the point. Christmas isn't about indoctrinating children with red-state ideology. If it were, the major networks wouldn't air those favorite cartoons in prime time, like "A Charlie Brown Christmas" and "How the Grinch Stole Christmas." Rather, they'd show something depressing like Schindler's List.
This guy's heart seems to be smaller than the Grinch's prior to his epiphany. Erik Lundegaard's heart is more like 8 sizes too small. Christmas is not about getting. It's not about trees, presents, Santa, television, politics, and more and more, less about Jesus.
I know, I know, the gasps ring round the world.
In fact, Christmas is about loving and giving. It is a time to reconnect with your family and friends. It is a time to cherish these close connections above all other things, as the most important thing. For some, it is about religion. And that's great...for them. I can't knock it. I can tell you unequivocally that Christmas is absolutely NOT about politics. No matter what Erik Lundegaard's desperate conspiracy-seeing mind might conjure. I honestly thing he could find a cozy little cocoon at the Democratic Underground. They would welcome his conspiracy theories.
The rest of us can see through his diatribe to the sour grapes that they mask.
Santa Claus is not an American construct. He has hundreds of names and is recognized by children all over the world. Is it so terrible for children to believe in something wholly good in this world where the have to live with the dual realities of war and global terrorism? Hell no. That's right, I said HELL NO.
For children, Christmas is about magic, and unconditional love, and dreams come true. None of these are bad things. And, you'll notice rightwing ideology is not high on the list of what children look for our are interested in. Perhaps, they are just interested in being entertained and having fun. Ya think?
Look, this guy pissed me off. Essentially he called me a nutjob who was blindly indoctrinated to rightwing ideology when my parents taught me about Santa Claus and let me watch tv. He totally negates my ability to think for myself and make my own choices. He even goes so far as to say, "First, avoid Santa movies. That suit’s red for a reason." He's a jackass.
I suggest he go back to watching Freddie Kruger and Friday the 13th movies, as clearly, they are more to his taste of murder, mayhem, and suffering.
I still believe in Santa. I do! And I believe that, seeing as how Santa knows all, that Santa knows that Erik Lundegaard has been bad. Beware the lump of coal in your stocking, Mr. Lundegaard. The next thing we know you'll be going around to daycare centers breaking the news about Santa to 5-year-olds. Sick bastard.
