Wednesday, July 23, 2008
THAT is not attractive
I realize that I am not some grand arbiter of men's fashion.

I realize that by writing this post I am making myself out to be a fuddy duddy or some sort of crotchety old lady, but so be it.

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Perhaps you may have noticed the teenage boy's fashion fad that will not go away?

You know what I'm talking about: Baggy pants that hang off of the butt, showing boxers (if you are lucky), "shorts" that are really men's capri pants with less shape, t-shirts that are 2, 3, even 4 sizes too big, haircuts that look like you may or may not be male (you could just be an unfortunately shorn big-boned girl)... These are the symptoms of the men's fashion moment that won't quit. We're going on what...five, six, seven years now?

How is this fashion? And, in the name of all that is beautiful in this world, who the heck is supposed to be attracted to this sloppy package? You look like you smell. And, I don't mean that in a good way. I mean, you look like you smell like instead of taking out the garbage at your mother's direction, you stuffed it in your laundry bin instead which is, coincidentally, where you found that charming ensemble you are currently wearing. Or, is it wearing you? Hmm.

See what I mean? I am totally channeling my inner granny.

These are teenage boys. I, not so long ago that I can't remember quite distinctly, was once a teenage girl. And, if my memory serves, teenage boys are very concerned with teenage girls. Well, maybe not the girls themselves as individuals in all cases, but at least they are concerned with sex.

I'm not going out too far on a limb, am I? Teenage boys like (at the very least) the idea of sex. Can we agree on that much?

Barreling forward, if you wanted to catch a fish, would you masquerade as a grizzly bear in a stream? I think not. So then, why are these bozos dressed as though they are auditioning for the lead role in The New Grizzly Adams: On the Rough Side of the Skateboard? Why do they present themselves as though they are in some sort of bum apprenticeship program?

I'm serious!

Teenage boys can be h-h-hot! Raging libido, rock hard body, stamina, no wrinkles...I realize I may sound a bit like Mrs. Robinson, but I'm totally not into that. What I'm saying is merely this: boys, it doesn't get any better than this so act like you are interested!

And, for heaven's sake, have a little pride! Get a haircut! Tuck in your shirt! Pull up those pants and wear that belt! Tie your shoes - you know how, I know you do! Put on your deodorant and smile once in a while!

I fear for the continuation of the species.

But, then again, with specimens such as these in the gene pool, maybe it is better if they sit this one out. Dummies.
posted by Phoenix | 2:35 PM


>1 Comments:

At 1:51 PM, Blogger Army of Mom said...

Oh, don't even get me started on this sloppy look. I'm always amazed to see fairly attractive teenaged girls with these walking fashion faux pas. It makes me cringe and giggle when I see boys like this. I have my sons trained - so far, so good - to see the baggy pants thing for what it is - disgusting. I'm hoping that I can keep it that way, too. Now, if I can get my 9-year-old to tie his shoes, I'd be ecstatic. That fad passed over my soon-to-be 14-year-old, but the 9-year-old loves it. ARGH!!!!!

 

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