Outing Yourself
Here's a topic for you: Outing Etiquette.I don't care what anybody's sexual preference is, other than my husband's of course. I simply do not care. This is not insensitivity or a callous disregard for my fellow human beings. No. I simply do not care. To be blunt, it is not my business.
Now, this doesn't mean that I don't believe that sex can be a crime. Forcing sex upon anyone is a crime. It is called rape. Sex with anyone who cannot or does not consent should be a crime. Since animals can not consent, I consider this a crime. Children, or people who have not attained the age of understanding the act and all of its ramifications, in my opinion, also can not consent. I do not care what antics you get up to in the privacy of your own bedroom, so long as the parties involved are consenting adults and nobody gets hurt.
That being said, I also don't believe that I should be held hostage by anyone's need to share their sexuality.
Let me be perfectly clear. I don't want to hear about what you get up to when I'm shopping for pasta, I don't want to hear about your proclivities and escapades while I'm waiting in line. I don't care who the engaging parties are, whether they are "innies" or "outies", or any bit of it. Frankly, that's not out-and-about talk. You want to discuss it? Do so in the privacy of your own home so that I don't have to hear it and worry about the small children who might also overhear it.
Again, I don't care what you do, but I refuse to let you subject me to that. Heaven knows I'm not going to subject you and the general public to the details of my intimate moments, so please don't assume that I'm interested in your bedroom shenanigans.
And here's another thing. I'm really glad that you have gone through this moment of self-discovery and have realized that you are a homosexual. However, I don't know what business it is of mine. I am not your friend just because you are a heterosexual, so your sudden announcement to the contrary is probably not going to drop you from my Christmas card list. I've never had a friend call and say, "by the way, just so you know, I'm hetero." So the notion that you need to call me and tell me you are "into bondage" or "boys" or both, is ridiculous.
I just don't want to know. Please keep it to yourself. I am not being insensitive or unsupportive. By all means, be who you want to be, just don't assume that I need all of the graphic updates. Do I bother you with the gory details of my menstrual flow? No? Then let's assume that I'm not all that interested in what you like to put where, 'kay?
When I was in college, at the end of my freshman year, a distant acquaintance of mine decided to "come out" to me. Now, I support his right to be whomever he so chooses, but I took umbrage at his timing. He called mid-afternoon on the weekend before finals started. I have always been studious, and even then I took my academic career seriously. So when I was neck-deep in Jackson's predidency and my Organic Chem notes, he calls to inform me that he is gay. Okay. I gotta go. I have a final on Monday at 8 am.
Congratulations and all, but if you want a ticker-tape parade, time your announcements a little better. I was your friend before the announcement and will be your friend after, but please respect the fact that I'm at college to prepare myself for the rest of my life and my career, not to keep track of your personal proclamations. Maybe after finals would have been a better time to make your decision/discovery known if you wanted a big show of support. I'm not going to stop studying, and essentially throw my father's good money down the toilet, merely because you need someone to pat you on the back. Nobody rejoiced in my embracing the heterosexual lifestyle. Why the heck should I celebrate your choice? It is yours to make. You want a celebration? Plan a private party for yourself and your significant other.
And leave me alone to suss out the impacts of the bank crisis.
